Should've Never
by Becks1
Summary: Literati. It's a songfic, but don't judge it before you read it! There's no way to describe it, but I'm a Lit all the way!
1. Midnight

A/N- Hey guys! Whatsup? I've decided that I'm a songfic writer and that's what I'm gonna stick with. I get inspiration from the songs and I write well when I have lyrics to go along with the story. Well that's my spiel. Hope you like this new one cause I'm pretty proud of it! Oh yeah, tell me what you think cause this isn't the end of it. I have more I just really wanted to post it.

Disclaimer- Hey I don't own nothin! The song's by Jennifer Lopez and the song is from On The 6.

Rory's POV

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I've been so caught up in the thought of me and you.

It's midnight. He should be here any moment. I can't believe all this is happening.

__

Even though I love someone else I know my heart belongs to you.

I know Dean's there and so does Jess, but it doesn't matter. Dean's safe and secure. It's my duty to be with him. He's the All American boy and I'm the Town Princess. It was meant to be. I love him, but in a brother/sister type of way. We have no chemistry.

Now, with Jess, I am in love. It is true. It is real. My thoughts wander to him unintentionally every time I have a moment to think on my own.

Tell me how did we ever let the situation get this far?

The window opens but it does not startle me. It is a regular occurrence at midnight. He climbs in and walks over to the bed where I am laying. I feel his body fall gently down beside me. His body comes into full contact with mine.

He leans over to kiss me. I feel a pang of guilt. I shouldn't be doing this. I kissed Jess back anyway. We have to talk later.

__

Maybe we should just try to hide the things we feel inside, things I know we can't deny.

We walk to the bridge like we always do. I say quietly "Jess?"

"Yeah?"

"Um. I really need to talk to you."

"Sure, what about?"

"Um. Us?"

"Uh. Okay. What about, um, us?" He said a little more nervously than before.

"Okay. Well, I love you, but I'm with Dean. And you know I couldn't tell Mom about this because she hates you and you know how stubborn she is. And I hate keeping things from her. And I can't tell Lane 'cause she doesn't like you either. And I can't break up with Dean 'cause I don't wanna hurt him and that's my duty 'cause I'm Rory Gilmore, the fucking princess of Stars Hollow!"

He held his arms out to me as I started to break down into sobs. I ran to him and he embraced me. It felt so natural being in his arms.

"But I can't give this up." I whispered into his ear.

"You don't have to." He replied sincerely, staring right into my eyes.

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Should've never told you that I cared about you. Didn't think that it would be so bad.

******Flashback******

"Jess, I, um, think I have more than platonic feelings towards you"

He looked up, shocked. He grabbed my face in his hands and kissed me more passionately than I've ever been kissed.

******End Flashback******

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Should've never kissed you.

******Flashback******

(SOOKIE'S WEDDING)

I lunged forward and kissed him. My arms were around him and he finally responded. As he did this, I realized Dean was 50 feet away and I ran.

******End Flashback******

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Should've never held your hand.

******Flashback******

He was sitting there, looking all cute, so I took him by the hand and suddenly he became less tense. He looked straight up into my eyes.

******End Flashback******

__

Got to find a way to let these feelings go.

I'm not supposed to be here. I'm not supposed to be with him. But I am.


	2. Thoughts

A/N Hey guys. Thanks for the reviews. I'm sorry it took so long for this to come out, but I've been so busy lately! This section is a bit different from the last, but I like it just the same and I hope you will too. 

I would like to thanks these people in particular_: tegan, Coolio02, kisstherain, csk8-20, and especially IloveJess_!!! Thanks you guys for your great reviews and I'd like to thank IloveJess for the long review and for inspiring me to write more.

Disclaimer- Hey I don't own nothin! The song's by Jennifer Lopez and the song is from On The 6.

****

Rory's POV

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What did I do the day I let you slip into my soul?

He's here. He's always here. Always in my mind, heart and soul. I know in this way he will never leave me, and I will never let him go. We have this connection, and it scares me. Not in a scary movie kind of way, but in an oh my god! How can he know me like this? I'm in love and it's so new, kind of way.

__

It was then when I realized I would always want you in my life.

I want him to be with me forever. And not just in my heart and mind, but physically here. Forever. Always. I don't think I could ever go back to being his friend either, knowing what could've been.

__

No one else can know of the things that we've been saying on the telephone.

*Ring Ring* "Hello?" I pick up.

"Hey Babe" Jess says in a seductive voice.

"Hey" I smile into the phone.

"What do you wanna do tonight?" He asks in a suggestive tone.

"Um, I was thinking you could come over? Mom's staying at the Inn tonight. Big conference or something" I say.

"Sure, sounds fun. What did you wanna do when I get there?" He asks innocently and I can just see him smirking on the other end of the line.

"Oh! I dunno." I say just as innocently, playing along. 

"Well, bye. See ya later. Love ya." He says.

"Love you too" I say and hang up.

__

It would be so bad if they ever knew that me and you were secretly into each other.

I can just imagine what would happen if someone saw Jess and I together. Mom would be disappointed in me saying "Why not choose and stay with Dean? Dean's perfect!"

Lane would be dragged away by Mrs. Kim while saying, "Why didn't you tell me? You could've trusted me."

"Oh my! I'm going to have to call a town meeting about this and figure out how to repair my town's tarnished reputation " Taylor would be saying.

"How long do you think this has been going on?" Miss Patty would ask Babette. Babette would answer with "I don't know sweetheart." The they would go their separate ways to tell everyone.

And Luke would have his head lowered to the ground, and every time he would look up he would shake his head.

I can't let that happen.

__

Should've never told you that I cared about you. Didn't think that it would be so bad.

******Flashback******

"Jess, I, um, think I have more than platonic feelings towards you"

He looked up, shocked. He grabbed my face in his hands and kissed me more passionately than I've ever been kissed.

******End Flashback******

__

Should've never kissed you.

******Flashback******

(SOOKIE'S WEDDING)

I lunged forward and kissed him. My arms were around him and he finally responded. As he did this, I realized Dean was 50 feet away and I ran.

******End Flashback******

__

Should've never held your hand.

******Flashback******

He was sitting there, looking all cute, so I took him by the hand and suddenly he became less tense. He looked straight up into my eyes.

******End Flashback******

__

Got to find a way to let these feelings go.

I'm not supposed to be here. I'm not supposed to be with him. But I am.

****


End file.
